This only happens to me. I think.

Funny things happen to me. A lot. It’s weird to me because I always say that funny things happen to funny people. Me? Not funny. Yet these things keep happening. 

Take today for instance.

I scheduled my doc appointment on my lunch break. Figured I’d be in and out and back to my office within, I don’t know, say 45 minutes.

Doc walks in and we get to chattin’. You know, normal small talk about work, kids, etc. You get the picture. I show him where my hip is still bugging and he does a few tests.  He figures out the issue within seconds (the man is a genius) so I’m stoked because I figure this will be easy peasy. He tells me I need to put a pair of shorts on and he’ll be right back. Guess my leggings weren’t cutting it.

He walks with shorts that look like scrubs that were approximately 25 times too big. Tells me to change and to open the door when I am done. These things were smokin’ hot I tell ya. I change then open the door and make a funny joke  “These hot pants should have been on the runway during fashion week.” while doing a spin. Crickets. I told you I am not funny.

He tells me to lay down and that he is going to do muscle stimulation and ultrasound first. I lay on my stomach and he starts to hook up the electrodes to my hip/glute. One goes on, we’re good, next one on and then silence. Weird. I decide I better keep convo going to break up the awkwardness. I get through 20-30 minutes of treatment by talking about running, mileage, marathons, whatevs. It was finally time to give my sexy shorts back, reschedule and say good-bye. Whew. Survived.

As I am walking to my car I am still trying to figure out where things went weird. Did I say something? No. Did I do something? No. And then it hits me…

He saw the butterfly tattoo. The one on my right butt cheek. The one I got when I turned 18. And it probably looked like it was going to fly away every time my glute contracted during muscle stim.

I can’t stop laughing.Crying laughing.

I immediately call LD and can barely get the story out because I am laughing so hard.

Ahhhhh my poor doc. I am sure he didn’t know what to think. That or he was snapping a pic and tweeting something like “Check out this piece of arse in my office.” Ok, that didn’t happen.

So to make things less I think I should write “Hi Doc” with a sharpie around it for my follow-up on Thursday. Wonder how that would work out…


Do these things happen to you? 

I was tagged again in 11 things so I will answer a few more ?’s in my next post and talk about the Pasadena Half that didn’t happen. Mommyhood. It rules.

16 thoughts on “This only happens to me. I think.

  1. Do you hate your bestie that you got your tattoo with??? Does it make you feel any better that I made a joke to my Dr. that was just about to do a Colonoscopy about “getting the side with the art work on it!”? I was on my way under people, the nurse was nice enough to remind me I said it when I woke up. 🙂 Man we are such dorks!!

      1. He was on my backside where I too got my first tattoo with you in tow. So I told the nursery who was by my head that she got my better side and the doc got my art work (tattoo).

  2. Love it!

    I had e-stim on my calves about a month ago. It was making my feet kick a little, kind of like swimming and the chiropractor kept saying “she’s trying to run away!”

  3. So funny. This stuff happens to me allllll the time. Not too long ago I wrote a blog post about my awkward experience with my sports chiropractor. It had to do with getting graston therapy on my lower groin/ab area and I mentioned that I wasn’t expecting that I’d have to be ready for bikini season. And then I said a few other things that were awkward. Story of my life. I think this was the post:

    1. OK, I just went back and read that post. I cant.stop.laughing!!! OMGosh Amanda, too funny!!!!!! When he went to get a female doc was he blushing?!?! AHAHAHAHAHA! I love stories like this 🙂 At least you know you are not alone!

  4. hahaha! Why am I not surprised you have a butterfly tattoo on your rear end!? I think that’s why I love your personality – you are such a sweetheart but, yet, you have a little crazy/wild in ya.

    I hope that all that stimulation ends up working – I had that done on my left quad year ago when I did PT for my chrondromalacia patella. Along with fifteen thousand other exercises to strengthen it.

    1. Me? Cray? Wild? Ahahahahahah 🙂 You might be right!

      So the nagging is a little bit of bursitis. SI was out and as soon as it was adjusted I felt all of the pressure go away. Amazing. Going to do 3 more tx and hopefullly that will be it. Told me to continue to stretch, roll and strengthen. This will probably be the story of my life until I am old and gray, lol.

  5. Bahahahahaha!!! I’m suppose to be working but needed a break and thank you for the best story EVER. I’m still cracking up and my work peeps are looking at me strange. 🙂

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